ASK MISS BLISS -SHE TIED ME UP, TOOK MY PICTURE & TOOK OFF

by Miss Bliss

Dear Miss Bliss,

A couple of weeks ago I received some great advice from you regarding my first date with a girl. Well, the date was successful. She is as cute as a button. We have very different body types; she is a very petite and I am taller and curvier. We had dinner and drinks, and she insisted she come back to my place. For some reason, she wanted me to be drunk when she started to caress my breasts and feel me up. Things started getting heavy and I found myself butt-naked while she was still fully clothed. All energy was focused on me which was great. I had a couple of intense orgasms but I really wanted to touch her. That didn’t happen. After she was done pleasuring me, she had me take her home.

Since then we had a second date and it was pretty much the entire experience all over again only this time she brought her own vibrator and tied me up, which I thought was great, as well. Once we arrived at my house, she started to remove my top and wanted to take pictures. She said she wanted to remember my large gorgeous breasts later on, but it was a bit absurd to me. Again, she wouldn’t allow me to undress her, but I did get a few small feels which was hardly enough to satisfy my needs.

It’s been two weeks now and neither of us have attempted to contact one another. This girl is really mysterious and there is a small language barrier between us because she is originally from Beijing and I have a hard time understanding her character. I am totally confused and kind of weirded out knowing there are pictures of my breasts out there. Does this type of behavior normally occur between two girls? I know it sounds naive or presumptuous, but I was kind of blindsided by the whole camera thing and her not being able to get naked.

Thanks,
Camera Shy

dancetit300

Dear Camera Shy,

Now you understand why men think girls are so crazy. There is nothing like dating girls to help a girl feel more like a guy.

Darling girl, this is by no means an ordinary or normal date between girls, and I can understand why are you are feeling used and cheapened. You entered into the date with love, opened yourself up to the possibility of great sensual pleasures, and trusted your lover enough to let her take control. But because of a communication problem, and because the two of you do not know each other very well, you had different expectations for the date.

There are many possible reasons why the girl wanted to please you but did not want you to touch her. I do not think it has anything to do with the difference in your body sizes. She obviously was into your body and you were into hers.

WHY DIDN’T SHE JUST GET NAKED?

1. She could be seeing someone else, most likely a man, and feels it would be cheating if you gave her pleasure. She is allowed to make you orgasm, but would be betraying her relationship if anyone but her primary partner made her come.
2. She could have some kind of STD, and not being able to communicate that to you, just “protects” you by not letting you touch her.
3. She could be on her period and does not want to gross you out.
4. She could be into BDSM and likes to “top” or “dominate” other girls. If this is the case, her pleasure comes from the power she has over you and the pleasure she gets from pleasing you.
5. Or, she could be a man. (Just kidding.)

BAD COMMUNICATION EQUALS BAD SEX

Whatever her reason, she was not communicating it to you, and this is a problem. Girls, in my experience, very much prefer equality in sexual trysts and enjoy making one another come again and again and again, trading off and taking turns. That is the beauty of two multi-orgasmic girls making love to one another. This girl made you feel insecure and confused because you opened your whole body up to her and she refused to do the same for you. Just because a lover makes you orgasm does not mean she can run off without letting you touch her at all. (Unless, of course, you both find that sexy.)

PICTURES WITH PERMISSION ONLY

As many of you know, the pictures of me and my friends on my page are all real, taken by my husband, and are true candids with no special lighting or makeup. Any picture with another person in it (even faceless) has been posted with permission. I love erotic photography and believe that pictures of women making love can be very empowering. However, we also live in a digital age and have to protect ourselves from pic collectors and other creepy folks.

These are my rules for erotic photography:
1. All pictures taken will be burned onto cd immediately, so all parties involved will have the pictures.
2. Any pictures that are “bad” will be deleted immediately and everyone has veto power.
3. No pictures will be made public, be put on a myspace page, or any web page without the explicit consent of all involved, even if the pictures are faceless.

If she was taking pictures for anyone but herself, she should have told you. In the future, if you do not know a lover well, do not let her take your picture. She has to earn your trust and friendship first.

XOXOXOXOXOXO
BLISS WARRIOR

HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FOR MISS BLISS? SEND THEM TO ME!

SO MANY OF YOU HAVE ASKED TO MEET OTHER BIGIRLS IN YOUR AREA. I AM CREATING A MEMBERS-ONLY SPACE FOR BLISS WARRIORS TO MEET AND POST FOR ONE ANOTHER… MORE DETAILS COMING SOON.

JOIN BLISS WARRIOR AND NEVER MISS A BLOG AGAIN!!
CLICK HERE TO JOIN BLISS WARRIOR’S MAILING LIST
YOU MUST HAVE A GMAIL ACCOUNT TO JOIN.

{ 1 trackback }

Bliss Warrior » Blog Archive » ASK MISS BLISS - SHE DISAPPEARED WITHOUT A WORD
January 9, 2008 at 6:54 am

{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

Persephone, Queen of the Witches November 7, 2007 at 10:52 pm

I love the camera rules and think they should apply to all photos taken by others. May I please borrow your rules to post on my site?

Reply

Pandora November 8, 2007 at 10:36 am

bliss, i actually seriously think that it was a man. it just sounds more like something a man would do….hmmm….
to the beautiful goddess who sent this:
every now and then, you will have experiences like that, especially if you are new to all of this. the more experienced you get, the more you’ll be able to gauge how someone will be. just chalk it up to an experience. good luck to you my dear.
yours truly,
-s

Reply

Beth November 8, 2007 at 10:37 am

Great letter. Great advice.
I would just like to add 2 things- being a larger woman myself and one that is into some BDSM- the clothes on part, I get. Sometimes, larger women (even open and confident ones) can have body image issues and don’t want to ruin the mood by bringing them up early on in the dating, sex or relationship. This COULD have been the reason. (even if you think she is beautiful and love her body and told her so-it still COULD be the reason)

OR

If she is into some BDSM- it COULD have been a light tease/torture thing.

OR it COULD have been both :)

As for the pictures- I agree totally with Bliss- be very very very cautious on these things. I would suggest calling her and discussing some of this.

Reply

Anonymous November 8, 2007 at 10:37 am

REPOSTED ANONYMOUSLY WITH PERMISSION

The most recent blog is interesting. In the lesbian community there is the “don’t touch me” dyke. Typically very much a top or the agressor. And in all honesty, most likely has issues.

Now to be honest with you, a lot of the dysfunctionality in the gay community drives me nuts. I have felt for years that gays buy into the stereotypes projected by a conservative straight right and it is incredibly detrimental to our own identity and mental health.

As conservative as I am (yes, how about that for an oxymoron…a conservative liberal, southern lesbo?!?) I am incredibly liberal with my view points about sexuality. I believe grown adults should be able to love whatever grown adults they so choose. I also believe the same applies for the act of sex as well. As long as persons are honest and open about it and all parties involved are ok with it? Who should have the right to say it is wrong?

But there is definitely a stigma attached to sex with individuals like the one who wouldn’t let the woman touch her. Whether it be guilt or shame or a total adversity to allowing anyone close enough to get past her outer shell. Women can be just as horrible at using other women as men can. That is why I personally shy away from casual sex…it does me no good except in that brief moment and then I feel bad about it after. If I am physically intimate with someone, I need to feel some sort of connection with them, even if it isn’t a lifetime connection. On some level it has to mean something to me. I just don’t enjoy it nearly as much (blame my damn Southern Baptist upbringing *wink) otherwise.

Pardon my lengthy response…I have met my fair share of women who fell in the “don’t touch me” category. And I avoid them at all costs…

Reply

alexis November 8, 2007 at 1:55 pm

yes, a friend of mine dated a “stone top” and said when they fucked her lover could do ANYTHING to her ,but she couldn’t touch her lover anywhere except like on the arms and stuff like that (no breast,ass or vagina stuff).
I think if you are clear about that I guess it’s ok, but to be misleading is not cool. Of course the woman may feel some shame about her feelings which may be why she didn’t just come out with it.
The picture thing was not cool, that kind of stuff should be agreed upon way in advance.

Reply

Tamera Vanzanten April 28, 2010 at 11:10 pm

I have come to your site before. Beautiful femme photo. BTW you have a sexy blog

Reply

Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: