ASK MISS BLISS – HOW DOES A “GOOD GUY” MEET A BI-GIRL?

by Miss Bliss

Dear Miss Bliss,

What would you suggest is the best way for a single guy like myself to meet single bisexual girls who would be interested in dating a good guy? Is it just luck? I’d love to date a bisexual girl, but how do you find them? All of them either seem to be married or in relationships already.

Sincerely,
J.


Dear Mr. Single Guy,

When I was 20 years old, I fell in love with the man who became my husband eleven years later. At age 20, I did not consider myself bisexual. I was not for or against it; it was a non-issue because I loved dating men. My man dated three bisexual women before we fell in love and said he “knew” I was bi before we began dating. When he discovered I had not been with a girl, he was surprised, but it did not matter: we were madly in love. If I was a straight girl it was fine with him because our connection was so true and strong.

As we explored our sexual connection, I asked him to share the stories of his romantic adventures with his previous girlfriends. The stories turned me on incredibly and soon I desired to share new passionate experiences with the love of my life. But we did not rush to take a lover because we enjoyed exploring the heights and depths of our unique sexual connection. We waited over two years before our first love affair with a girl and because we waited, experienced a wonderful, trusting, deep connection with another.

The point is, my good man, if you go looking for a girl just because she is bi, you are setting up a shaky foundation for a relationship. Fall in love with who you fall in love with. Straight or bi, the right girl for you is a girl you go mad for; a girl who whips you for life; a girl you must experience everything with because you adore her that much. Find the woman with whom you can grow in love together.

It is actually quite easy to meet a bi-girl that will make out with other chicks or go to the swing party with you. Just go out to some club on a Friday night and you can bring home your very own hedonist or freak. If you want an empty hookup, you can find it easily. But if you want to build something deeper and truer, find the right woman to love first. Don’t worry if she is straight or bi.

Many bi-girls do not tell the men they are dating that they are bi because they have learned that many men will treat them like trash. Guys will say anything to convince a girl he wants to be her boyfriend when really he is just seeking a free pass to the sex club. However, if he is a “good guy” and the girl realizes he is the real deal, she may a year or so into the relationship, reveal she is bi. She may even have a girlfriend or two she would like to share with the man she loves. But to find this girl and to keep her, you must be a true gentleman who knows how valued and loved his girl should be. She is a superhero of love and only the best man is worthy of her superpowers.

XOXOXOXOXOXO
BLISS WARRIOR

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Bliss Warrior » Blog Archive » ASK MISS BLISS - MY GIRLFRIEND’S UNHAPPY WITHOUT A FEMALE LOVER
May 20, 2008 at 1:46 pm

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

mrs. creepz January 15, 2008 at 9:05 am

:: clapping….:::: thank u miss bliss. i enjoyed the part about.. the guys that are seeking a free pass to the sex club: there are way to many guys like that out there, we bi-girls need to be careful who we trust with our divine “superpowers.” and girls nneed to know that these freaks who want to use us exist.. be weary girls…

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dave January 15, 2008 at 9:06 am

Right on the money Bliss!

“…to find this girl and to keep her, you must be a true gentleman who knows how valued and loved his girl should be.”

I feel so very blessed to have found a “superhero of love”. But is wasn’t the bi-girl aspect that I fell in love with…as you said, that discovery came later in the relationship. She was “a girl you go mad for…a girl you must experience everything with because you adore her that much.”

Just keep being yourself Mr J, and good things will happen

…from one of the “good guys”.

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S. O'Terick January 15, 2008 at 12:05 pm

While I acknowledge that bisexuality sometimes includes someone having more than one partner, I am sorry to see that this is what is largely the view of bisexual people (both within the gay and straight communities). I identify as bisexual (being more attracted to men, but still having the undeniable attraction to women), but I know that I need to be monoamorous. For me, it isn’t necessarily about the person’s gender identity…it’s about the person! I like both men and women, but I don’t need both at the same time, and I’m not the only bisexual out there who feels this way. Bi’s are often characterized as “greedy” or “confused”, and I feel that taking on more than one partner only adds fuel to that fire. I’m not trying to moralize anyone…I’m only trying to express my desire to see more presence of a monoamorous line from the bi community.

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ashley January 15, 2008 at 12:06 pm

Yes, blissy b!

your humbled response is genuine.

‘fall in love with who you fall in love with’. enough said. how can one truly dictate matters of the heart?

xoxo
a

Reply

Miss Bliss January 15, 2008 at 1:02 pm

To Miss O’Terick,
Thank you so much for a wonderful comment.
I love the phrase “monoamorous” and think that as bisexuals,
we need to respect and honor the diversity within and among us.
Some bi-girls are monoamorous,
and others are not.
You are very right that more attention needs to be given to those
bisexuals who are monogamous and date monogamously.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
BLISS WARRIOR

Reply

michelle January 15, 2008 at 6:02 pm

I just read your blog for the second time today and I LOVE IT! I understand that the boy would love to find a bi sexual woman. In my opinion, what man wouldn’t?! duh. However, to seek one out is kind of rude. How would he be able to see the forrest for the trees? I mean, in his search for a specific “type”, he’s missing them all! And missing the point of love. In my own search, i refrain from a “type”. The ones I fall for always break the mold! Sure, we all have ideal criteria, but I would never let it limit my search. Mr. Single Guy should start loving all women equally and genuinely. Treating every single one of them as goddesses, then the love will come pouring in. Till that time, like Miss B says, go get yourself a couple freaks! They’re easy to find!

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Tiger January 15, 2008 at 6:46 pm

Ah, the single man who wants the seemingly elusive bigirl. Unfortunately, there are many men (not all) who will exploit a woman’s bisexuality for his own gains. If you tell a man that you’re ‘bi’ and he immediately asks “when are we having a 3some”….RUN for the hills. Actually, the emotionally more sensitive male may wait a few months, truthfully tell you he cares for you and then pop the question. Hmmm…is he an exploiter? It’s not that easy to tell when you’re in the relationship. You’ll truly know if he’s an exploiter after the relationship ends. So be careful and wise. Trust your instincts. Take your time to develop a trusting committed relationship before opening it up to others. Once you go “there,” you can’t go back.

As for the other person’s comment about “monoamorous,”…..bisexuals and homosexuals are frequently portrayed as freaks by many segments of society. Unfortunately, there are those within the bi/gay communities don’t help the stereotypes either by engaging in unethical behavior (by cheating). While monogamy is a beautiful thing, it is NOT for everyone. I applaud couples (gay, straight or some version thereof) in happily monogamous relationships! Some couples choose to have OPEN relationships. I’ve met a handful of committed loving couples in these types of relationships. They require TOTAL trust, commitment and LOTS of communication. They talk about anything that might makes them feel slightly uncomfortable when with others. It’s the only way open relationships work. Good luck to those who are trying!

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Sybille January 15, 2008 at 9:50 pm

all I can say Miss Bliss is bravo…love who you love for who they are, not because you have some ulterior motive…always appreciate so your perspective.

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