by Miss Bliss

“Darling, girl,” I said to her, “I cannot wait for your book to come out.”

While my husband and I were in Miami, we had the pleasure of dining with our good friend, Andrea Askowitz and her beautiful new girlfriend, Victoria. We first met Andrea in Los Angeles while she was pregnant, single, and writing her upcoming memoir, My Miserable, Lonely, Lesbian Pregnancy.

“May 1, 2008 is the due date. I’m finally having a book,” Andrea said. Curly haired and fiercely funny, Andrea’s book chronicles her artificial insemination and lonely pregnancy as a single mother-to-be.

“When we first met,” said Victoria with a sexy Spanish accent, “I just fell in love with Andrea, and her daughter is so gorgeous! Such a sweet girl.”

“Her daughter is beautiful, isn’t she,” I replied.

“We haven’t seen the little one in over a year,” my man said.

“I wish you could have seen her, but it’s good for us to have a night out once in awhile,” said Andrea.

“She amazes us. She’s so smart, so kind… Just the most perfect little girl.” Victoria smiled and touched Andrea’s hair. “You two don’t know how lucky I am to have met Andrea. When I read her book – you know she has that one chapter where she tries to make love to a man who has come to massage her…”

“That is an amazing chapter,” I said, proud to have been in the same writing workshop with Andrea when she read it for the first time. “A lot of people don’t realize that some lesbians occasionally enjoy being with men or even want to be with a man.”

“I know,” Victoria explained. “I read it and said, ‘This is so hot. You have to expand it. I want to hear more!’”

“See,” Andrea said, “Victoria’s like me. A proud Lesbian Bisexual.”

“I read a study somewhere,” I said, “where lesbians, over the course of their lifetime, tend to have more male sexual partners than straight women do.”

“Really,” Andrea asked. “I guess that makes sense.” We threw around some theories as to why that may be true and decided the cool lesbians were more open to all sorts of sexual encounters as they discovered and defined their own sexual identity. Some girls had to experiment with men and women until they found the right partner and the sexual orientation that fit them.

“Did we tell you that Victoria’s trying to get pregnant,” Andrea asked, changing the subject.

“You are? That’s wonderful,” I said.

“Are you being artificially inseminated like Andrea was,” my husband asked.

“Yes,” Victoria said beaming and Andrea kissed her on the cheek. “I’m on the hormones now. We’re using #3342′s sperm.” In Andrea’s memoir, #3342 is an important – albeit absent – character. The tall, brilliant, anonymous sperm donor who Andrea chose to be inseminated with is only referred to in her book (and in her life) as his donor id: #3342. Victoria continued, “Andrea’s daughter and my baby will be siblings! Little did Andrea know when she purchased eight extra vials of #3342′s sperm and froze it, that someday her girlfriend would use it to get pregnant.”

“That is the most romantic and beautiful story I’ve heard,” said my man.

“Isn’t it,” Andrea said with joy.

“It is,” I said smiling. “Do you want to get pregnant again, Andrea?”

“Didn’t you read my book? No way! No more pregnancies for me.”

We laughed as my man and I held each others’ hands, delighted that science had made a new type of family possible.


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May 21, 2008 at 10:25 am

{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

andrea askowitz February 6, 2008 at 6:06 pm

I love this love story, but here’s the deal: I didn’t actually have sex with that man that I wrote about in my book. I wanted to, don’t get me wrong. I was getting a massage and I opened my legs and I begged. But he was only about the massage. This was the low, low point in my pregnancy.


Miss Bliss February 6, 2008 at 6:58 pm

darling girl, thank you for the clarification!
i have edited the blog to more clearly reflect your experience.
i will also post this on my myspace blog.


Do It In The Dirt February 6, 2008 at 7:02 pm

Darling Bliss, I just happened to catch a glimpse of the date when you signed up on myspace and created a profile. It is exactly one year from today. It amazes me how much you have accomplished in one year. I tip my hat to you, madame. Congatulations and may you have many more years of bliss.

Thanks also for the interesting story. I read or heard somewhere that hormone changes MAY contribute to SOME lesbian women going the route of bisexuality and sex with men. Principally the argument was made that as lesbian women move into the childbearing years, they start becoming more interested in sex with men as a procreation-instinct-related thing. However, once they get through the childbearing years, they transition back to girl-girl sex primarily and lose interest in sex with men. I wish I could remember the source because I thought it was fascinating how complex and diverse the factors affecting sexuality and sexual orientation are.

The Dirty Girl xoxoxo


Tia February 6, 2008 at 7:03 pm

How poignant!


goddess lelly February 6, 2008 at 7:03 pm

this is great… do you mind if i repost on mine? I think this would be great for more people to read.


shannon - freedom fighter February 7, 2008 at 6:01 pm

One of the sweetest, most romantic thing I’ve heard in recent years… know people could be so giving ( donors) in hope of others who want alternatives. Thank you so much for sharing.


Samantha February 7, 2008 at 8:03 pm

A sweet and touching story, Bliss. I’m glad I popped in and caught it. Your blog is still one of the most comprehensive I’ve encountered so far. While I deliberately try to stay on one topic, you offer such a delicious cornucopia of pleasure and practicality. With the range of topics and insightful posts, BW is always a fulfilling stop. Once you start giving photography and design advice, I will no longer have a need to leave the house. (lol) All that and taking the time to help a struggling blogger. Thanks again, you’re an angel.


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