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In New York and LA, my single girlfriends often complain there are no decent guys to date. These aren’t your ordinary-hopefully-she’ll-find-someone-nice-type girls, either. These are beautiful, intelligent, successful, sensual, well-heeled goddesses. Being in a successful 14-year relationship, many girlfriends ask if I can introduce them to someone, and the sad part is, I can’t think of a single worthy guy.
So, I tell them, “While you’re between boyfriends, date girls.”
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Paula laughed, just like Michelle and Erin. Susan made a face and said, “I hate girls, they’re way too crazy. I could never date one.” Jenna smiled and asked, “Are you flirting with me?”
There are many positive reasons for straight girls to have a fling with a girl or two between boyfriends.
#1 GIRLS APPRECIATE YOU
They notice that you spent an hour in the bath, and an hour on your hair, curling, smoothing, and pinning. They appreciate the color of your eye shadow, and are dazzled by your ruby bracelets. They study your shoes, look up through thick eyelashes, and tell you how seductive you are. Nothing is more intoxicating than preparing for a date, knowing that just a few miles from you another girl is doing the same ritual for you.
#2 GIRLS SMELL GOOD
You know that your hair smells of lotus flowers and your wrists are kissed with lavender, but you cannot know how yummy your girliness really is, until you hold a girl in your arms and breathe in her hair.
#3 SEX MAKES YOU SEXY
Waiting around for your soulmate-perfect-nonexistent-rich-guy will only leave you alone and miserable. Make love to your fun and hot girl friends and you will glow. Out of nowhere men will come flocking to you, as your energy will be so sensually charged and exciting, no man will be able to resist you. Girls who play whith girls only make men more intrigued.
#4 DATING GIRLS BEATS HATING GIRLS
Women are conditioned from an early age to compare themselves to other women, and we do it all the time. Entering a room, a girl will size up who is prettier, who’s thinner, and who’s happier than she is before she notices a single man. Sizing up the competition, we hate the girls we see who seem to be everything we want to be: maybe she’s tall, maybe she’s got skinny arms, maybe her skin’s clear, her hair’s straight…
The secret truth is this: ALL girls think they are the ugliest, fattest, worst-dressed… We are all insecure. How do we fight this horrible insecurity? Approach all girls knowing they can’t see the beauty you can see. Tell her how gorgeous she is, how lovely her hair is, how pretty her cheekbones are, and she will be overwhelmed and moved. Hearing complements from “the competition” makes the complement feel more real than if it came from a man. And, because you’ve helped her feel more confident, she can now open up and tell you how incredible you are.
Love girls, give them complements, appreciate their precious details. It will make you more beautiful.
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I love women who are nice to other women. I see beauty in all colors, shapes, and sizes. I love compliments from women, they almost mean more than from a man. You know that when a women compliments you, she has been admiring you from a distance. I believe ALL women admire other women from a distance, but most of the time never say a word to them. Speak up ladies. Support one another. Smile at women. Stop glaring and start gazing.
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I was with a chunky woman for a time,but then we had to part ways. Then I hooked up with a lovely,blue eyed and red haired,tall skinny gal.Every time I see her my whole being is moved. I cant imagine swingin to date a man,under the circumstances.Although as you said,they do flock!! Ex hubbies and bfs are like “Wow,what did I miss???” Now,I cant wait for the PDA!!!
Thanks for this blog!!!
Simba
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